a pen and prepared to write on the envelope. “His first name is Albus,” he said helpfully. “Who would name their child ‘Albus,’” Petunia muttered as she wrote his name on the envelope. He refrained from comment. She sealed the envelope and handed it to Skull Alas Poor Yorick You Are One Dead Mother Fucker Vintage Shirt Harry. He took it, walked over to the cage, and took out Hedwig.
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“Got a bit of a special delivery for you, Hedwig,” he said to the owl. He tied the letter to her leg and opened the window. “See you soon,” he said as she flew outside. “I asked him to respond to you, not me.“I understand,” Harry said. “I’ll give it to you when I get it.” Petunia nodded but did not leave. She stared at Harry for a moment, then suddenly said, “How could you agree to use Dudley to Skull Alas Poor Yorick You Are One Dead Mother Fucker Vintage Shirt taunt that boy? How could you endanger him like that? Dudley couldn’t know what he was getting into, but you should have! What were you thinking?” Harry looked glum and nodded. This was the first time Petunia had ever yelled at him for something he actually deserved it for. “I wasn’t thinking, is the truth,” he admitted. “It just never occurred to me. But I would • 95 • never deliberately endanger Dudley or anyone in this house.” He hoped she would believe him. “No, Dudley,” said his mother. “For you.” “For me??” Dudley sounded outraged. “I don’t need that! I can take care of myself!” “No, you can’t, Dudley!” his mother exclaimed, frustrated. “You tell him, Harry.” Harry looked at Dudley with a serious expression.
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. “You’re not used to Skull Alas Poor Yorick You Are One Dead Mother Fucker Vintage Shirt the idea of needing protection. It sounds insulting. Believe me, I know. But it’s a totally different situation with wizards. You’d simply have no way to defend yourself. It has nothing to do with how strong or brave or capable you are. It wouldn’t even matter if you had a gun in your hand. A wizard could whisk it away, just like that. I know that stinks, but it’s just a fact.” Dudley gave Harry an angry look, but Harry knew Dudley was angry at the situation, not him personally. In a sulky way, Dudley said, “I wish I could do magic, then I could defend myself.” “Dudley!!” Petunia nearly screamed. “Don’t you ever say that! Don’t even think you don’t know what death is, Dudley! You’ve never seen it! But I bet Harry has!” Dudley looked at Harry questioningly. Somberly, Harry nodded. “A little over a year ago, in a school competition, another
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